One of my latest posts was titled Good Enough. To that, I received so many amazing and encouraging comments and thoughts — more than I could’ve expected.
I first wanted to thank each of you who read that post and responded to it. It reassured to me that I have a life full of support from people that love me. As you know, I was timid/afraid to share with you my feelings. The response was uplifting, and for that, I am beyond thankful.
I wanted to revisit that subject as it has been several months. Overall, I would say I am in a much better place than I was then. I have done a lot of praying and thinking and praying some more. I’ve done a lot of scripture reading and asked for advice. I am thankful to say that God has shown himself to me so much recently. I’ve began a prayer and encouragement journal (which I encourage every Christian to do) and listened to uplifting Christian music a lot lately. All of these things have me helped so much.
My view of my life has changed. My view of God has changed. My view of myself has changed — all for the better. Through God’s love and my closeness to Him, I have realized my true worth. I no longer feel alone. I no longer feel unworthy. I no longer feel like I am not “good enough” for people.
I have been made just the way I am because God wanted me to be that way.
Do I still have those days where I feel ugly? Yes. Do I still have those days where I feel fat? Yes. Do I still have those days where I feel alone? Yes.
But through all of those days, I am reminded of God’s love for me. I’m reminded that I am always beautiful. I am reminded that weight never adds or subtracts value from my worth. I’m reminded that I am never alone because God is always with me.
Through this love for and from God, I have overcome negative thoughts. I have overcome temptation. I have the strength to say, “Satan, get behind me!” (often out loud…). With God’s grace, I have been forgiven of my many shortcomings. Through that, I’ve learned to love myself as much as God loves me.
Am I still working on myself? Yes. Will I probably always be working on myself? Yes. I think we all are.
I’ve learned it is okay to mess up because Jesus erased it all. I’ve learned I don’t have to be perfect because I never will be.
If you know me, you may have heard me say, “People will always disappoint.” However, I somehow never included myself in that statement. I am, in fact, a person. Therefore, I will disappoint myself.
However, no matter how hard I try to be perfect or strive to be good enough for everyone, I never will be.
But that’s okay. It’s okay because God makes me perfect through Jesus’ blood. He has erased — and continues to erase — all of my sins and the times I’ve messed up.
Does this mean that I can go on with my life sinning as I want to because Jesus covered it all in His blood?
I need to work hard to follow His commands because I’m on my way to heaven!
I pray that you begin to understand this precious gift as I have. I am definitely still learning about God and working on myself as I think I will always be.
The more and more I fall in love with Jesus, the more and more I fall in love with myself and learn I’m okay the way I am…
…Just an imperfectly beautiful daughter of God.